I seem to slowly fade away, in flames my ideas, my effort and my strength burn so rapidly and nothing makes sense anymore…. The struggle, the eternal fight, the never ending story of the times I’ve failed to comply my own goals… Here I stand six feet away from falling into an open hole in the ground where I stand…. Lonelier days will come and silence has overrun every corner of my mind…
What is real?
What stop us from turning into our own enemies?
Where do we cross that thin line between though and crazy?
What have I Become?
Have I turned into a shadow?
I’ve gone from my own light, my own shiny planet in the starry sky to a shooting star rapidly fading out and nothing more to give but a chaotic conclusion to an overwhelmed life…. Here I stand again fighting the same fight I’m sure I will not win this time around… it’s hard to help myself nowadays, can’t seem to find an open door or at least one thats been left unlocked….
What has happened to me?
Where is that spark that used to make me stay alive?
What is sadness and what exactly does it mean?
One thing is certain, theres nowhere else to go, I’m trapped inside my own prision and I have condemned myself to death row….
Is death necesarily the action of a breathless corpse that lies motionless in some Godforsaken place under three hundred pounds of dirt?
Or is it to walk alone for the remaining amount of breaths I have left in my cigarrete-stained lungs?
“I’m full of excuses”
I tell myself,
I’m full of restless memories of forgotten days when everything was fine…. Nothing makes sense today or any other day for that matter..
Will it ever change?
Will it ever be ok again?
Will the sun rise?, and if it does, will morning ever come?